Here is part one (of three) of Mom's Cancer story. This is the speech that I presented for Lung Force - a campaign started on May 12th by the American Lung Association to bring awareness, recognition, and support to Lung Disease. I've made a few tweaks, but hope you'll appreciate the message.
I hope this goes without saying, but please recognize how difficult it was for me to write and then publicize this. Any harsh words or criticism will be removed to protect my family and I.
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Every five minutes, a woman in the United States is diagnosed
with Lung Cancer.
On August 30th, 2011 at 4:00pm, that woman was my
mom, Debbie.
My name is Jessica and I’m here tonight to tell you about my
late mother, her one year battle with lung cancer, and how it has affected my
life. This photo is of our last family
vacation, in Bar Harbor Maine, taken just 6 weeks before her diagnosis. We spent 10 days hiking, boating, relaxing in
Maine – and it was wonderful to spend time together as a family. I had no idea it would be the last trip we would take together - or the last time I would feel unbridled joy. Mom was a little short of breath and coughing
a bit, but we thought maybe mom had bronchitis, or pneumonia, and it wasn’t a
huge concern – who wouldn’t be short of breath and coughing at 60 years old
after an 8 mile hike!
We came home, and
began to see doctors about her symptoms.
Following a lung biopsy and meeting with an oncologist, Mom was
diagnosed with Non-Small Cell Lung Cancer.
I was shocked, mad, sad, and frustrated.
These emotions & many others were overwhelming as we called those we
loved the most to tell them about her diagnosis. The most difficult call was to my brother, Christopher,
who was deployed with the US Army to Korea for 18 months. I could hear his heart break through the
phone, and had none of the answers he needed.
I googled my heart out – stunned to find that her five year survival
estimate was less than 20% - she wouldn’t see me turn 30, she wouldn’t see my
brother get married, how was this possible?! How did someone who yes, was a
casual smoker in her 20’s and 30’s get Lung Cancer! She exercised 30 minutes a day, ate chicken
and carrots for lunch, and was in wonderful health her entire
life. She was a 60 year old woman, who
was in better shape than lots of 30 year olds I know – this would benefit her
in the weeks and months to come.
Like most cancer patients, once we got over the shock of her
diagnosis, it was time to form a plan – and that plan involved chemotherapy. Dad took her to so many doctors’ appointments
he had his own notebook with names, terms, and
questions to ask. The more challenging
aspect of the diagnosis and treatment was understanding the words, phrases, and
medical jargon that these doctors tossed our way. It made it hard to form coherent thoughts at
times, especially as Mom was accepted into a medical study. This meant rather than just a regular drug,
she was going to get a trial drug – results unknown. Her first round of chemo was every other
Friday for 12 weeks, and I took her to (almost) every session. Mom was a little lady, and there is no way
she was safe to drive before or after chemo.
Although that didn’t have anything to do with the chemo itself, it was
the Benadryl that made her loopy, silly, and a general good time! But we made the most out of those 8 hour sessions – we Christmas shopped
online, made photo books for gifts, and watched movies. I guess you’re supposed to be quiet in the
treatment area, but Mom & I must have missed that memo – we laughed, got
scolded, and laughed some more. While
Chris was home over Christmas Block Leave, he took Mom to chemo – and she asked
him to go in his full Army dress uniform.
She had talked and talked to the nurses about how proud she was, and she
made the most of her time to show him off.
So there he sat for 8 hours, all dressed up, spending some quality time
with Mom. No way was cancer going to
keep Mom down – with the exception of those chemo sessions, she worked
full-time through treatment.
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(Part 2 to come)
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